When Your Fans Are Misogynists

I really don't want want this blog to turn into a merely a dissection and analysis of incidents involving misogyny. From time to time though I do think I will comment on whenever something happens in the media. I was not aware of the events involving Maggie Serota and Kevin Smith until someone else wrote an article about it that I saw in a sidebar. That blog linked to a third party's blog, that of Jill Pantozzi of The Mary Sue; a blog I've never much cared for personally. I read over Jill's blog, then Maggie's original blog, and finally Kevin's wrap up blog to get the full picture of what happened.

To summarize, Maggie wrote an article reciting what someone else wrote on Reddit listing a number of titles that are expiring at the end of the year on Netflix. In her article, Maggie had a throwaway line about no one missing "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" from Netflix Streaming. That joke was tweeted to Kevin Smith who then Retweeted it asking why Maggie's holiday spirit had left her so soon after the holiday. This apparently resulted in numerous fans of Kevin Smith to harass Maggie Serota with your typical nerd rage abuse and, of course, rape and violence. Maggie slammed Kevin Smith for his fans' behavior and Smith apologized for them. Finally, Kevin Smith took to his blog to summarize the incident from his point of view and asked his fans to stop with the misogyny. End of story.

This is such a minor incident that it doesn't seem worth commenting on, but I thought why not comment with my own unasked for opinions, much as Jill had done?

First, I wouldn't consider myself a fan of Kevin Smith. I've enjoyed his movies. I even own "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" on blu-ray because it came in a box set... although I don't believe I've watched it since it came out in theaters. Maggie's joke was just a throwaway gag and one she should've singled out "Troll 2" instead. It would've hit the exact same note and no one would've gotten riled up about it. I'm a bigger fan of "Troll 2" than "Jay & Silent Bob", but if that film gets slammed, I'm not at all offended or upset. I doubt even the biggest fans of "Troll 2" would've come after Maggie with death threats because of her joke. Her joke was probably accurate however because Smith's fans already own the movie; I actually doubt all that many people will be upset they will no longer be able to stream it. Kevin Smith also tends to go overboard with his bonus material, so it pays to buy his films on disc anyway. Although, I do know the blu-ray is devoid of extras, but I know there's a 2-disc Collector's Edition of the movie with loads of extras I'm not too interested in seeing.

I want to point out one piece of ignorance in Jill's blog where she excerpts one threat made against Maggie of "put a dick in your mouth". I know that's a reference to a podcast of Kevin Smith that he does with Ralph Garman. I've listened to that podcast off and on and I know that it's a phrase with no malice behind it. Kevin Smith says it to every man and woman who is visiting Los Angeles. Jill is unfamiliar with the podcast, so she took it as pure misogyny. These kind of offenses are what bug me.

Misogyny accused against words or phrases with no malice behind them is leaping to the worst conclusion. In fact, this whole incident is a case of everyone leaping to the worst conclusions. Kevin Smith explained he knew the dig wasn't an actual rib against him, but his fans took it personally. Maggie saw more responses to her Twitter than she normally sees and immediately figured Kevin Smith commanded his army to make her life a living Hell. Not the case either. Smith then explains in his blog that his fans actions are uncalled for and then does something I appreciate: He continues to call out Maggie Serota for bullshit. Normally with celebrity apologizes they have to apologize for the whole kit and caboodle, including for things they are right about. Smith does lay it out that Maggie did leap to conclusions and is reacting too defensively to what has happened. While correct in condemning her attackers, her own crucifying of Smith was wholly unfair. Also to Smith's credit, he does acknowledge that an artist is partially responsible for the actions of their fans. Thus, Smith chided those that threatened to rape Maggie.

As for the fans, I know the internet is an evil place. At this moment, I'm reading comments for a story about an underage prostitute that Kristen's Archives over at the Alt Sex Stories Text Repository posted. Several of the comments are putrid with their appreciation of the illegal acts in the story and some even wish it was even more brutal against an even younger girl. I'm not condemning the story written by Chris Hailey, because I'm a firm believer that fiction is a safe realm to explore taboo actions and topics. I'm well aware that there are men out there that desire underage girls. Child pornography is one taboo I am absolutely turned off by, but I would rather men with that fetish get their kicks from works of fiction than to ever act upon their desires against real girls or hunting down actual photos. There's no reason to with our internet culture.

Back to my point, reading the comments of the story, I am willing to bet the men posting would NEVER say any of the things they are writing aloud to anyone in real life. They have just found an outlet to release their dark halves. So to is Twitter used to make vile threats against others. This goes into a bit of Rape Culture.

Rape is a weapon for men. Rape is about power and control. Men use threats of rape to put a woman down or "in her place". Men like to be dominant, both with women and other men. This of course is abhorrent to women like Maggie and Jill, it makes their environment all the more colder, crueler, and dangerous. Jill wrote about her own receiving rape threats from Smith's fans for putting down his reality show "Comic Book Men", because the show did not let her be on it. As I mentioned, I'm not a fan of Jill's blog because of her "voice" in her blogs. It's one that I do not respond to personally, and frankly I'm not surprised several men get riled up by her posts, so much so they have to threaten her with rape. That said, in America there is freedom of speech and Jill is allowed to post whatever she wishes without fear of getting viciously attacked by insecure men. That is why I do not comment on her posts explaining how ignorant she can be, I simply do not read her blog.

This is also true of Maggie Serota. She is allowed to post whatever she wishes too. All she did was repost an abridged version of a post on reddit and added a joke of her own, which to be fair wasn't that funny. Kevin Smith's fans then leaping on her was of course an overreaction. Even calling her a "cunt" is taking things too far.

As 2013 is ending, was this another horrible case of misogyny this year? No. It is a sad case of one's fans being immature. It's also a case of pointing out how the incident is part of a much bigger problem both on the internet and in real life. I do hope Smith's fans will listen to his pleading for them to stop with the misogynist threats. Also, women like Jill Pantozzi and Maggie Serota will post what they always do, no matter how biting it may be. They have every right to and they have fans of their own. They will continue to call out criticisms against them as misogyny even when it isn't malicious. They do this to make their fans aware of this issue of men immediately going to rape as a weapon. They do not want men to do this, so they call attention to it. I'm not sure how to combat Rape Culture's Rape Weapon, but I see what they are trying to do and until there is a better way of getting men to stop harassing women on the internet (and real life) they should continue both. But as Smith points out, while doing that, we mustn't then be less responsive to communication. We cannot get on a high horse and no longer talk to anyone else. We cannot group the haters with the person they follow. Through communication we do get posts like Smith's where they very boldly chastise their fans and tell them: Your behavior is wrong, stop doing it, or else you are no fan of mine.

I also type all these thoughts in defense of my own blog. While I do not consider myself a misogynist, as I love women dearly, I do know I am occasionally turned on by misogyny. Stamping out that fetish from my psyche is not going to help, if anything repressing it will make it worse. Instead, I find safe places to revel in those dark fantasies, then I come back to the real world and do whatever I can to help women against actual hate crimes against them. But using this blog to reflect on the misogynist perspective I feel will ultimately be constructive. I know some readers will absolutely be repulsed by my writings and thoughts and mark me the worst of the worst. For everyone else, I hope we can find balance between what is appropriate both in reality and on the internet in our safe zones.

Happy New Year to you all. I hope 2014 is a good year for men and women equally.

Thoughts on "Most Misogynistic Moments Of 2013"

As this is my first post, I thought I should include an introduction.

This blog will be an outlet for thoughts I cannot express in public for various reasons. Posts may be cruel, misogynistic, or worse.

The Gloss posted a Top Ten Misogynistic Moments of 2013. I thought for my debut post, I would comment on them.

10. The Response to Angelina Jolie’s Mastectomy - I've never been much of a fan of Angelina. I've enjoyed her in films, but I have never sought out a film just because she was in it. My thoughts on her removing her breasts to combat cancer are strangely apathetic. I have masturbated a number of times to her topless scenes in "Foxfire" and "Gia"; her topless scene in 'Foxfire' being a favorite, Elizabeth Mitchell's beautiful breasts being the real focus of my self-gratification in 'Gia'. I would think I would lament their loss more than I have. Ultimately, I do not think they were extraordinary. Their finest performance being in 'Foxfire', but the reason that scene was so erotic was that it was a scene featuring actresses portraying high school students who take their blouses off in front of each other in order to mutually share in an intimate, personal tattooing experience.

As for the misogynistic response to her announcement, I'm not surprised. The men that have oogled her breasts have much to lament. The Gloss points this incident as being a bunch of men seeing Ms. Jolie as nothing more than a pair of breasts and that her sexual worth is all but gone with their removal. Despite my own misogynistic thoughts, I am not less attracted to a woman by the removal of her bosom. If anything, I am more turned on by the removal of a woman's defining physical appearance. There has been multiple stories that have satisfied me which include scenes of forcefully removing a woman's breasts. It is tearing away more of her femininity. A woman's own perception of herself is torn from her and in these stories she feels less a woman, less a human, less of worth. It's empowering for a misogynist.

Ms. Jolie had a choice in the matter. This was not evasive surgery to stop the wide spread of breast cancer or accept death. In that end, she has stripped cancer of its power and fully owns it. Outside of this blog I do not acknowledge myself as a misogynist because of defiant acts of womanhood she has shown here. As the root of all my deviancy revolves around "power", I actually find her taking charge of the situation to be a turn on in itself.

As for the future of her career, we'll see. As mentioned, I am not a big fan of her work, but neither do I think her breasts have played a significant role in the performances of hers that I have enjoyed.

9. The Onion calls Quvenzhané Wallis a Cunt - I didn't even know what this incident referred to. The Gloss describes the incident as invoking "the most anti-woman slur of all of the many anti-woman slurs."

Ah, the word "cunt". Personally, I do not use the word with other people. In social situations I know it is incredibly taboo. Behind closed doors however, I frequently use it as a way to demean a woman for sexual pleasure. The root of the problem being that by describing a woman as a cunt, you are stripping everything away from her except her vagina to fuck. Again, the word is one of many to make a woman feel worthless.

Men use it to describe a woman as a "bitch", just an unpleasant person. In the UK, it is used as a crude form of affection. I actually do not think any man who uses the world actually means it the way women take it. Men are not smart enough to strip away a woman to just call her a hole to fuck. They honestly mean to call the woman a mean name, because they feel the woman is being mean themselves.

As such, anytime this word creates a scandal, I immediately drop any interest. The reason it is taken as such is because of how women reflect on the word... But when men do not mean it as they do, is it really such a problem? This is part of the debate, but my line of thinking is frequently labeled as misogynistic in itself. It's never appropriate says women and any use of it and you are horrible person.

That said, this girl called the word is a child. That is incredibly mean although it was said in jest.

8. Miley Cyrus - Miley Cyrus is not attractive. Her trying to be a sexual creature is disgusting and repugnant to me. I believe she has every right to "own" her sexuality, but nothing she does will ever be attractive to me. Her voice sounds like a heavy smoker, her accent makes her sound mentally challenged, and her lesbian appearance is just not to my taste.

Is her traversals damning all women? I say no. She is a unique individual and her actions only reflect on her. I do not expect all women to twerk and stick out their tongue. I wish they would, but sadly all we get is this girl trying to further her career.

7. Blurred Lines - I avoided much of this song this year. I do not care for pop music for starters. I know this caused a scandal because the song itself embraced the male perspective when it comes to women. The women in the music video were even fully naked and used props. I think that was the point and while I am turned on but such schools of thought, I hate the flaunting of that way of thinking through shitty music.

I did find a parody of the video featuring women using men as sex objects to be a turn on however. I am not a submissive creature and I find no sexual pleasure in being dominated by a woman... No, I found enjoyment in their video because the women singers themselves became objects of my fantasies. As soon as they become higher than thou, stripping them of their power is the turn on. Watching them humiliate men only furthered my own mental attraction to seeing them forced in the reverse situation.

We then returned to the original video, which people describe as having rapey undertones. No, that is not rapey undertones... The women in the parody video in chains being humiliated would be rapey overtones. That is infinitely more appealing than a woman with no emotion being used as a sexual object by a man who would then dress as Beetlejuice.

6. Caroline Criado-Perez & Prejudice - Another news story I was not that familiar with. A woman campaigned to have Jane Austen's face put on a note of currency. This was not met with support but rather extreme threats. Again, I don't care if people change the face of currency into women. Seeing men get up in arms about it, to me, seems like a waste of time. There are so many actual issues to get upset about.

What makes this story interesting is reading the threats news outlets separated and quoted. These men excessively threatened her with rape. Online trolls use rape as a weapon. I actually doubt they would rape anyone when put in the situation. For them, it is an empty threat. At worst, a perverted fantasy. Rape is all about power. A woman leading a change on the face of currency is pretty powerful - so that men respond to that power with a desire to strip her of it and forcefully fuck her is not surprising.

This blog does not exist to change the Rape Culture of men. I personally do feel it needs to be pulled way back by society, but I also think it is a legitimate sexual fantasy. One I hope people do not actually act upon. Rather, I would like them to better relish it behind closed doors or in consensual sexual activities with a loved one. I know from experience that women have their own secret desires to be dominated. Not all of them, of course. Many of them would never admit it outside the bedroom. But it's part of their psyche. Just as many perversions are part of mine. But in society, we owe it to ourselves to not be so disgusting to one another.

I am not surprised by the reactions against Caroline. Those reactions will always exist.

Apparently the whole incident has caused massive psychological damage to her. My gut reaction to that is one of horror and pity. I hate seeing anyone bullied online actually so psychologically damaged by it. The other side of the sword for misogynists is the reveling in causing psychological trauma in a woman. The appeal is that the woman is forever altered and affected by a man's actions. That is an incredibly powerful thought for a man to have. It's a dark evolution of a man's pleasure in taking a girl's virginity. So unfortunately, Caroline being so hurt by the threats only results in the same men being sexually gratified by their lambasting victory of her.

This kind of abuse I am both against yet deeply interested in. In real life, it is tragedy. Men, I rather you not be so crude in your insults and especially that would not actually send them to someone. In fiction, this abuse is a secret pleasure and desire. It is humiliation and domination without needing to invoke bondage or making a woman a sexual slave. It is a mental war, with great prolonged psychological after effects. I do like reading about a woman's struggle in these situations - but only if it comes from a safe place.

5. Rape Victim Painted As Wanton Teen Temptress - There's been numerous news stories of women after being raped being accused by the defense that she was the cause or complacent in it. The reason for it is that it is the only defense a man can take when accused of rape. That is a tricky situation of he said, she said often in courts. Because of its impossibility to prove one way or another, the accused rapist often gets away unpunished - and the woman painted as a whore. Yes, that is a problem in society that it often steers this way.

Then there's cases of this fourteen year old girl. I do not have time to read into all the details of this story and my verdict without reading much anything about it is: No Opinion. But I will say in the defense of the defense whose case focuses on the girl being a "wanton teen temptress" is that teenagers are sexual creatures. It is entirely possible the girl is as overtly sexual as Miley Cyrus. A prison guard could absolutely take advantage of that. Even consensual though, she is a minor and it is rape. So their defense doesn't even sound like a defense.

The girl had been previously raped as well. Part of the defense is that her overt sexual advances are PTSD to them... While that sounds like a turn on and would make one hell of an erotic thriller- under these circumstances, even I am disgusted. ... But if she was eighteen, would I be just as disgusted? Oh, hypocrisy.

4. Seth MacFarlane hosting the Academy Awards - I did not take the Boob song as misogynistic nor taking away from acting achievement just because an actress showed their nipples. This kind of reaction does sound like an overreaction - rather one trying to not make it socially acceptable to objectify women in this way. I already talked about my pleasure of Angelina Jolie's breasts, but even though I have orgasmed to their scenes, I do like Ms. Jolie in numerous other movies, ones she has kept her breasts covered. Yes, it is nice to see a woman's bosom, but I think all men do like actresses for more than just seeing them. Female reaction to this kind of objectivity seems to me misguided. No one is saying an actress is worthless except for her nude scenes and believing that is what Seth MacFarlane believes just seems especially ignorant.

Completely unnecessary comment, I very much await the day we get to see Jennifer Lawrence's unclothed breasts. Again, it's a power thing. She is specifically singled out as for not showing hers yet. But we all know the day is coming. Seeing Kirsten Dunst's breasts are still a life's highlight. And I still very much defend her as an actress. Having seen her bare breasts is just a luxury. Jennifer Lawrence's breasts will of course not take away from her performances.

3. Return of Kings - I am again unfamiliar with this site/blog. This post is also taking much more time than I had intended to sit and write, so I will not research it. I will assume their site is similar to TheChive. TheChive prides itself at objectifying women and posting teasing pics of countless women. But... Why the hell are women submitting photos of themselves with statements like "Keep Calm and Chive On"?

Anyway, misogynists blog. There's no stopping that. At least take some solace that a man who is open with his misogynist thoughts does not read that site.

2. Titstare - Apparently this is an app to help men look at breasts in public. We all know men sneak peaks. I am just as guilty. Whether I like it or not, I sneak peaks at looking at the breasts of all my female friends. Yes, truthfully, I do feel bad whenever I sexualize a friend of mine. Being good friends with them, I feel I am betraying their trust by looking at their cleavage and for a moment imagining them bare, caressing them, or even outright having sex with them. Personally, I do not think men need to gawk more so at women in public. We have the countless women on the internet whose unclothed breasts we can stare at for hours.

Back again is the question whether boob worship is misogyny? Again, I say no. Breasts are attractive to men. We are not dehumanizing women into simply a pair of breasts. Porn models, maybe because we watch them purely to sexually gratify ourselves; rarely is there emotional attachment. But women in our real lives, even actresses, I am willing to bet you men like them all for more than simply the curve of their breasts.

1. Pregnant(?) Women Are Not People - This is about a politician who is against abortion and wants to take the choice from women, because they do not understand what's happening in their bodies. Politicians are all a special kind of dumb. I don't think many of them actually are as misogynistic as they reflect in their positions. Positions are all about getting votes. They rarely reflect on the person standing on them. That said, I'm sure Greg is pro-life, but I do not think he's going to chain a woman up in his basement, use her as a human toilet, rape a baby into her, force her to deliver it, and repeat the process. Making this number one is absurd. The reason it was is because he's a politician with the power to help make laws thought would enforce such legal stripping for every woman.

I rarely take interest in such feminist views. This is a matter for feminists to protect their right to choose what happens with their own bodies. I understand and support their cause. But I also want to draw the distinction between true misogyny and merely passing laws on behalf of personal beliefs. There's a big difference. Misogyny is about the true hatred of women. Misogyny would be if we were rounding women up like cattle and breeding them in farms with not control over their breeding. Outlawing abortion is more philosophical in my opinion. It is an operation, not a line between women's lib and sexual slavery.


Well, this write up has taken a couple hours longer than I had planned to write, but perhaps this was a good first post to establish certain ideals and beliefs this blog will have. Let me emphasize, I do not condone the darkness in this blog in real life or social situations. These thoughts are all best kept in private with yourself or shared privately with a loved one. In other words, Rape Fantasies are ok for men to have, but actually acting upon them is absolutely abhorrent and against the law - do not rape!


Happy Holidays.